How to Craft Your Opening Statement to Get a Raise
You’re asking for a raise. You invite your boss to a coffee shop around the corner (a neutral location to minimize distraction and potential power imbalances). And after all the small talk, here’s what your “opening statement” might sound like:
Okay, your turn!
The three-step approach will fuel your growth as a person and as a professional. You'll develop self compassion, resilience and the confidence to advocate for yourself.
Fear of judgement or rejection won't be an obstacle, but a nudge that helps you seek your own validation from within. You'll have your own back.
And when you make smart asks that delight your employers and clients, you'll become unstoppable.
Women, we have to have our own backs. We can’t blame our employers for not paying us what we’re worth if we chronically underestimate our value, and hesitate when we have an opportunity to negotiate.
Use this email template to get your boss to pay for your negotiation training, or any other professional development training that's on your path of leadership development.
In the third installment of Fearless Asking, we're getting clear on what our negotiation conversation partners want and why. Getting clear on what we want and why as well as what they want and why helps us find common ground and mutual benefit. To do this, ask open ended questions, such as "What are your desired outcomes?" "What are your concerns?" Or "How can we solve this problem so that we can both get what we want?"
In the second installment of Fearless Asking, I talk about the Itty Bitty Sh!tty Committee, the voice of self-doubt that keeps us safe from harm but also small and resentful.
When we heed the voice of this saboteur, we are likely to encounter the 3A trap and end up in a worse situation than if we had calmly confronted the issue and asked for what we want.
You can be an ambitious, brave AND collaborative negotiator.
You can be a communicator who leads through problem-solving, value-creating conversations.
In his excellent book Never Split the Difference, former FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss explains there are three basic types of negotiators: Assertive, Analyst and Accommodator. Each has different needs, interpretation of time and silence, strengths and weaknesses.
If your company could take one bold action to eliminate your gender gap and improve your bottom lines, I can think of nothing better than to teach everyone how to negotiate like a woman.
When I went to intern at Golden Seeds at age twenty-eight, I chose a feminist enterprise over a paying job where I was more often judged by the choice of my blouse than my contributions.
Just one Due Diligence Note Every Day for a Week