Listen.

We're all somewhat afraid of conflict, at least those of us who are not sociopaths.

Men and women both want their days to pass without having accusations hurled at them, without hearing what a frenemy is saying behind their backs, and without stirring their colleagues or clients to anger.

Women, however, do tend to react to a negotiation challenge somewhat more fearful of an angry response than do men.

parents, maybe a liberal arts degree is not such a bad thing

We want our daughters to be happy and love the work they do. But passion and value don’t have to be mutually exclusive. No matter if your daughter is angling toward Warner Brothers or Ringling Brothers, learning to negotiate a first salary is a skill that will continue to produce benefits across all levels of life far beyond the first negotiation.

Negotiate to Look Forward to Your Future Not Fear It

Lisa GatesJune 4, 2013Consumption, Feminine Leadership, Negotiation for Women, She NegotiatesComment

Are Men Bad Negotiators?

Negotiation Takes Courage

When we think about negotiating for something we want, even before we get to asking – we’re just thinking about it here – we enter into conflict. That conflict can be within ourselves or with others.

Job Hunting at 50? Do the Jerry Maguire

What if you’re now in a job search at say 53? How do you convince the 35-year-old manager you’ll be sitting down with that you are unavoidably perfect? That the double whammy of age (bias) and no advanced degree are non-issues?

'So What?' The Chunking Up Exercise

asking "So what" allows you to connect the personal to the professional, and perhaps even the social and political. And this is why we say learning to negotiate is so transformational.

Negotiation Ground Zero

NegotiationVictoria PynchonMarch 15, 2013Lisa Gates, Negotiation, She Negotiates, negotiation as improvisationComment

6 Reasons You May Still Be Unemployed

Business, Career Strategies, Education and LearningVictoria PynchonMarch 14, 2013first impressions, hiring managers, interview, job search, recruiter, sStacey Gordon, women executivesComment

NYTimes: You Are Due For A Raise

Business, Career Strategies, Negotiation, Pay Equity, SalaryVictoria PynchonMarch 7, 2013Negotiation Consulting, She Negotiates, Victoria Pynchon, Wage Gap, asking for a raise, mmarket value salary, negotiation consulting for women, recession, salary negotiationComment

The Mythical Distinction Between 'Work' and 'Home'

Business, Feminism, Productivity, WomenVictoria PynchonFebruary 28, 2013Negotiation, Negotiation Consulting, Victoria Pynchon, Women, Workplace, family, women's movementComment

What If There's Nothing Wrong With Women?

End Guessing Games, Uncertainty and Anxiety

Business, Conflict Resolution, Entrepreneur, Interest Based Negotiation, NegotiationVictoria PynchonJanuary 30, 2013Negotiation, Negotiation Consulting, Victoria Pynchon, art of negotiation, artificial intelligence, behavioral patternsComment

Leaning Into Leadership

The Career Reboot in 21 Books

Imagine these two (paraphrased) research statistics being bookends on a young woman’s “bookshelf of life.” The single biggest predictor of poverty among women is the birth of their first child.

Putting off having children for 10 years doubles a young woman’s lifetime earnings.

Working for Love AND Money | Your 2013 Mantra

I know deep down you know how valuable you are. You’re smart, you’re fast. You’re well loved. You have degrees and credentials. And experience. You can look back on your career and tick off a passel of accomplishments. You are a store of value and the shelves are stocked full. So why are you:

Are you Conflict Averse?

Avoiding conflict, however, can be damaging and deprive us of opportunity. Overcoming conflict requires courage. It takes courage to acknowledge our human fallibility, acknowledge wrongdoings, make amends and reconcile with our fellows.

How to Negotiate Authentically When You Have No Idea What You're Doing

When we wake up from our negotiation slumber, we start recognizing that we've been negotiating all our lives and doing a pretty bang up job of it. When we REALLY wake up and learn the basics of negotiation, we become toddlers again. We run into things, bang up our shins and bonk our negotiation noggins. We struggle to find ways to authentically negotiate and put our new negotiation toys into practice.

NegotiationVictoria PynchonOctober 11, 2012Negotiation, authentic negotiation, diagnostic questionsComment

Women, Got Negotiation Pessimism?

You’d think that all our cultural conditioning to be fair, unselfish, accommodating and collaborative would show up in our language and our conversations in a positive way. With an upswing at the end of our sentences. But it doesn’t because we’re burying our potential and it’s inauthentic.

That downswing in our voices belies our fears limiting beliefs.

Best Practices: Help them Grow or Watch them Go

Help Them Grow or Watch Them Go is a tremendously timely new book that just might launch a “coaching culture” revolution in organizations desperate to attract and retain talent, and remain competitive.

Useful Advice